| You wanna tap this? |
[11 Feb 2004|07:49am] |
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 horny. |
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"Stripsearch" by Faith No More. |
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I forgot about this thing, which is natural... considering my lack of free time. All my time nowadays goes to keeping my relationship with Mark a secret (although, I'll gladly admit it to you), studying Pearl Jam bootlegs (that'll never change), pretending to keep busy, and uhh.. other stuff that involves farm animals that were previously Michael Jackson's, some trash I found outside of Todd's Adult Store, and this fucking weird light up dildo that Jenna Jameson was marketing.. very hot.
To be perfectly honest, (which I always am, because I am the Stappinator), I haven't been keeping up with Creed news. A little strange considering I'm the core member. This I know. So if there's any news as far as new releases go, I guess you'll be just as pleasantly surprised as I would be.
My kid is a little shit. Still. I'm glad he's taking after his father, let me tell you. Well right now Mark is sitting on a bed full of feathers naked, in this freezing weather (I'd swear that was his excuse as to why it is that small, but no biggie.. literally) just waiting for me to penetrate him. Sigh, the life of a rock star.
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[disclaimer]
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| You make me feel like a man, children! |
[02 Sep 2003|11:48pm] |
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christ analogue - so brand new |
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Argh, life sucks! I was busted for having kiddie porn on my computer. I swear it wasn't my fault, I always put it on disks! Well whoever was on my computer browsing this pr0n, will pay. How dare they enjoy the fun without me there. I am not amused whatsoever.
So to get out of jail I had to do one of my more desperate acts, strip to Madonna's "Like a Virgin" while dry humping the wall. While I did enjoy it, I felt violated being forced to do this! Oh well, it got me out.
I think I'm going to stop at a bar or two with Markie poo. Make him be my bodyguard for all the jerks who even say the name 'Eddie Vedder'. Augh.
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| wow. |
[17 Aug 2003|04:56am] |
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Butterfly Messiah - The Wicked |
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sorry for lack of updates. it's been nearly a year. a lot has happened. mark and i are still together. he nearly proposed. but the new bassist has been throwing me off our game. fuck, he is hot.
anyway, my ex-wife, apparently, fucked multiple guys in our own bed. i bet she was lying. i licked those satin sheets from top to bottom and didn't taste anything! then she bashed me in the head with her cellphone. markie baby kissied it better. hot sex, i say.
i haven't written anything for this new album i'll have out in the near future. i'll just take a stappy crappy (it's a sport!) and think of stuff on the shitter. like corey from slipknot. LOL.
some girl offered me her body. i've never had intercourse with a woman, not even my ex-wife. that stork had perfect timing when he gave me jagger. no joke. mark and i like to put him on our laps and pretend we're driving along a bumpy road.
well, i have to go to the porno store before it closes. candle wax for nipples with the scent of my ass. i cannot pass this up!
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[07 Oct 2002|11:41pm] |
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soundgarden - limo wreck |
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Long time no talk. Apparently my darling Mark Tremonti got a journal of his own (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) mark_tremonti) How dare he need a girl. *sigh*
Life's been busy what with my fake injuries from my ever so traumatizing car accident. More and more people are beginning to hate me and my band and I am sad. Now I finally have something somewhat worthy to write lyrics about. Ta.
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| Damn. |
[06 Mar 2002|08:48pm] |
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The Doors - Soul Kitchen |
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I found an article bashing our concert!! It was absolutely scathing. But I found him attractive so I forgave him. He wont return my phone calls about having lunch together. I bet he thinks I'm going to pull some kind of joke on him.
Mark went out and got me a new Jim Morrison worship memorial. My other eight hundred of them were getting a little tiring, but honey bunny made my day with this totally surprising gift. So, for our anniversary, I am planning an awesome vacation to Alaska!! Mark has gained a little weight, and I think it'd be best if he didn't take his shirt off. The good news of the trip is that we will be going to an Alaskan strip club! Hmm..I wonder if the catch of going there is seeing polar bears dance. *is excited*
Phillips made a joke about the cream savers hard candy today. It aroused me. But then again, what doesn't? Anyhow, the joke was basically how when I orgasm, I am flavorful. Mark was jealous. I love it when he acts manly. He tries too hard, though. *sigh* Brian would still be in the band if Mark didn't find out about our affair.
Anyhow, we're still on the charts. I should be happy that we made it to number one. But our naive fans takes the joy out of it. Sure, we are loved, but loved by idiots. *Sigh*
Jagger was angry that Mark and I were making out at a PTA meeting. He made a whole scene and the teacher was a total bitch. "Find a motel, boys." I'm sorry, but I refuse to take time out of my love life to sacrifice, no pun intended, tee hee, myself to Jagger's needs.
What does he want? I gave him my last name, his father has fame, and that's my game. Tee hee. I made a poem. *will show Mark later*
Some fan is bugging me for my autograph. Unless he forks up twenty bucks, he can go sit on a knife. *is aroused*
Bye.
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| *sigh* |
[19 Jan 2002|10:40am] |
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Alice in Chains - Rooster |
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You'd never believe what some crazed fan did at our concert a few nights ago. Actually, it was more like anti-crazed fan, but whatever. He threw his stinking Creed Sucks shirt at me and told me to get a REAL job! Can you believe this guy? ARGH.
Mark was ticked yesterday. He said how I shouldn't make his ripping off Metallica and Slayer so obvious. I got him a new glass dildo to make up for it, and he's happier than ever!
Phillips was off making out with our manager. That turned me on in a weird way. I'm so jealous now...I don't want to tell Mark that..he'll be angry and throw one of his tantrums and make me buy him a new sex toy.
Anyhow, VH1 has named us band of the month. That's cool...I wont tell anyone how many VH1 executives I had to sleep with to get our band in that postition....
*sigh* I have to go buy a new Pearl Jam bootleg...I still cannot get why the fans are more into their songs than ours! ...Off to go study Vedder's moves...
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| Tool's song "Hooker with a Penis" is really good, I wonder if he is a hooker with a penis. God, that'd turn me on. Maynard really ought to be a hooker. I'd love to bake his cookies. |
[29 Nov 2001|02:05pm] |
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Tool - Hooker with a Penis |
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It's been pretty hectic around here. I hardly have time for myself anymore. I'm going to have a physical at the doctor's tomorrow. Goody! I wonder if he can refer me to a specialist that gives good barium enemas.
I went to Best Buy the other day to cheer myself up by seeing no more records on the huge "Weathered" stand. I'm in agony. Can you believe some person put a hole through my head?! People are so rude and inconsiderate. I wonder who let that person do it. My head was way too big to take off that tree. It had to have been noticable...and to top it off, there was still hundreds of records on the shelves getting dusty!! *sighs*
I think I'll go make Mark do a little striptease for me.. I need a good laugh.
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[disclaimer]
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| Soundgarden turns me on. Chris Cornell is hott. I wanna fuck him. HARD. ---- oh shit, Mark better not have read that. |
[09 Nov 2001|12:43pm] |
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Soundgarden - Burden in My Hand |
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I never knew a person could make themself nauseous. I found out it was possible by looking at myself in the mirror. I had a pretty big impact on the director of "My Sacrifice." I took off my pants in his dressing room, and he left to vomit. I'm seeing a trend..wait. No I'm not.
Anyway. Mark and I made up! With a big juicy smooch full of tongue. He told me he was looking out for me. He said that the pleather made me sweaty. And that he hated it when people called me sweaty, nasty Stapp. Or ugly, nasty Stapp. I forget which. I guess there was no cure for the ugly...err. I'll try not to wear pleather out in public. I heard cotton breathes. I don't really get that saying. Eh.
Scott went off to see his therapist this afternoon. I don't know what goes on in there, but I've heard all the sessions were about the band. Maybe I'll go and torture the therapist until he tells me what I want to know, by taking off my shirt and making Jesus poses. Or, I could just play the video for "Higher."
I just heard a lyric I'll use in a song!
"I lost my brain today, would you cry for me?"
And it came to me without any musical influences.......honestly....I swear...I really really do.....not to God, of course. Because I'm still questioning my religion..even though my tattoo confuses me....
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[disclaimer]
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| I am cliche. |
[09 Nov 2001|06:01am] |
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NSYNC - Gone -- Oh my goodness, Justin is HOTTTTTTTTTTT |
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With this new album out, I thought, what the hey, might as well have a Stapp journal. Ah, that didn't make any sense, but I am stupid.
Mark and I had a fight last night. Oh my goodness, it was awful! Mark wanted me to stop wearing pleather! So I told him he should stop wearing his cowboy shirts. Then Scott interrupted by saying how he should rule the band. Don't be silly. The girls don't even think he's hott!
Wha...well. I'm hoping sending Mark some flowers, and wearing my frosty blue lacy bra will turn him on --- err --- make him want to have oral sex again --- errr --- eh fuck it. Maybe he wont be so uptight about my pleather pants! He used to like them! Oh well.
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